Can this really be happening to me again...yes it is.

So I'm having a serious meltdown because last week I got mastitis and I had to take antibiotics and now I have the dreaded thrush back.  Why, why, why, why(head hanging down and tears streaming down my face).  I promised myself that if I got that again I wouldn't put my family through my emotional ups and downs dealing with nursing problems again and now I'm faced with the decision to quit nursing cold turkey or try to work it out.  Emotionally, I am having a hard time deciding to let go because I FINALLY have enough milk supply for this baby and everything seemed to be going great and I've seriously never been so happy after having a baby, but I feel like I'm going to have problems with mastitis in the future since there are a few ducts I can feel she's not able to empty so why continue? I guess I was just so hopeful and dedicated to making it work this time.  I had thrush with Bea for 6 MONTHS and wasn't able to get rid of it so the thought just makes me sick that I got it again.  I'm not kidding when I say that I feel like I'm in a state of Post Traumatic Stress.  I am in shock(literally since I feel strangely similar to how I felt shortly after Georgie died, is that really weird?) that I got this again, I feel depressed and am in a numbing daze, I've been crying all day and am in denial that I have to go through this trial again.  I don't know why this is so important to me but obviously it is since I feel like such a huge part of my life right now is being ripped away from my control.  I don't know what to do.  I haven't nursed since 9am and every hour I feel worse about not feeding her.